Eden: Iveta and I attended church together and were in Bible study together, and Iveta served as a deacon at her church for a time. [She’s] just a faithful follower of Jesus. So, thank you for being with us today.
Iveta Berzinch: You’re welcome. Glad to be here.
Eden: Is there one thing or several things that especially bring you joy?
Iveta Berzinch: Yeah, certainly. There are quite a few. I do love reading God’s Word, and when he speaks personally to me through it, it’s just amazing and difficult to grasp sometimes. So it’s beautiful. I love being in nature; I love hiking. Maine is one of our favorite places. Being with my family, of course, and seeing kids get along even though they’re grown. So those are some of the things that bring me joy.
Eden: Wonderful. Is there a place that you’ve hiked that’s your absolute favorite you’ve ever been to?
Iveta Berzinch: Well, yeah, I think obviously there are so many beautiful places, and it’s not like we’ve been [to] many, but Maine—Acadia National Park—and of course Rocky Mountains National Park in Colorado.
Eden: And you said that God’s Word is part of what brings you joy. Is there a part of God’s word, like a chapter or a verse, that is especially precious to you, and if so, can you share a little bit about how it became so precious to you?
Iveta Berzinch: Well, yeah, I love, of course, Romans 8. Everybody loves that. But John, chapter 17, “the high priestly prayer” is close to me. I love that part, just knowing that Jesus—way back then—prayed for us and prayed for God to give us the unity through the Spirit and [the] church. So those things, and also, I’m not sure which chapter, but in Luke, as I was reading the part where Jesus is already on trial, and Peter is sitting by the fire, and the people are saying, “Haven’t you been with him?” And after he denies him the third time, the Lord looked at him. And it was like I almost experienced that look. It was so odd and so personal, like I was there. I saw his face.
Like in spirit, of course. And then I love Ephesians chapter 3, the ending: Now to him be the glory because he can do far more abundantly than what we think and can ask. And just to know that God’s love and his mercy and grace through his resources—they’re inexhaustible. So, it’s overwhelming—in a good way.
Eden: Yes. Well, that’s a lot of really precious parts of Scripture. And it’s clear that you have come to know the Lord well and delight in what he says. And we would just love to hear how you came to know Jesus—and in as much detail as you’re willing to share.
Iveta Berzinch: Yeah. Well, so I grew up in Latvia, which is Baltic country, and at that time [it] was part of [the] USSR, so communist regime. And I was not aware of anybody being Christian in my family or even [knowing] anything about God or that there is a God. Obviously, the whole communist pattern is to keep God out of [the] picture.
Then around the time I was like nineteen or twenty, there was a pastor who moved in above us. And through some interaction[s], he gave me a Bible. And so I started at times reading it. I remember loving Isaiah, which I forgot to mention. I love Isaiah [and] Jeremiah as well. And [I] even started grasping a little bit of God’s holiness. Well, I wouldn’t say holiness at that time, what I understood, but how different he is and that there is sin in the world and whatever.
But then with my pursuing the medical career, that all—the Bible and all that—more or less faded in the background. I would go to some services occasionally or here and there. I would look at people who look[ed] devoted, and it just seemed odd to me, like I just could not understand them. It just seemed like fanatics or something. Anyway, then I ended up coming to [the] United States essentially at the very end of 1990, and again, through some circumstances, got involved in or started going to Latvian church, because I was seeking Latvian community as [the] culture shock and everything [set in].
[I] learned some things, but they were just intellectual, theoretical, religious. And then, you know, [I was] pursuing career and family. And so it seemed like I was achieving things, because diligent work was something that I was raised with. And so [I was] pursuing, trying to almost earn that love. But as I was achieving things, I still was very dissatisfied, very even bitter, I would say.
And with time, all that started feeling more and more empty, even though I had a good job and I had a practice and family and kids and going on vacations and all that. But it just would never satisfy. I would live for the next vacation, for the next trip, for the next whatever. And it just grew emptier and emptier, even though I enjoyed some time, but it just didn’t last, and it didn’t satisfy something deep in me.
We were worshiping with some Presbyterian church in Georgia, and I definitely would say that God was speaking to me through those sermons. And eventually I got involved in [a] small group and started getting a sense that there is something deeper, that there’s something that I don’t have.
Eden: Yes. So you would say that—even as you read the Bible early on in your twenties and then as you were in church communities—you still didn’t quite connect the dots that the god they were talking about and the God of the Bible was what you were longing for. That wasn’t connecting?
Iveta Berzinch: Yes. I wouldn’t connect those. And of course, those church communities—my involvement in them was different in different places, and also the communities were different. Some, even looking back, I would say it was just more the traditional, ritualistic, religious kind of thing. But still, there were some people or some pastors or some sermons that would speak to me.
So with time, I felt like I started almost like communicating with God. The more I read, I started doing like a devotional and a gratitude journal. That was around 2010 or something like that [that I started that]. And so that made me think more about my life and seek something deeper.
And so I started realizing with time how much brokenness, how much wrong [was in] my growing up family: My family of origin was rather dysfunctional. When you’re growing up, that’s all you know. But once you start encountering something different, something pure, you start realizing how far you are from that. And so that burden started growing and started suffocating me, and just the situation I was in in my practice and just the life there—it was simply too much for me. I just got burned out, quite literally, in every possible way. It was also kind of [a] mid-life crisis, I think.
So, God used all of that. My only solace, my only little string that kept me going, if even that at that point, I knew there was more about God. There was more. And I was yearning for that. But I still didn’t have [a] good idea how to get to it in a sense.
I can’t say that I didn’t hear the gospel, because I imagine it was preached, but maybe not as clearly, and I just wasn’t hearing it. My desire was to escape that total burnout. And so, my plan was to move back to Latvia. And we tried in 2015. For various reasons I’m not going to go into, it did not work out. So I was there with two of my three kids over the summer. And then it became clear we have to come back. And so that’s how we ended up in Chicago area instead of back in Georgia, because I had kind of left all that.
And so, I ended up home with kids who were now early teens and mid-teens, and one was out of [the] house in college. So I just didn’t know who I was at that point, because my whole identity had been in being a doctor, being successful, whatever—nothing grandeur. I was in a very dark place. I did not know what the future held, what I [was] going to do or whatever, but so I had—all of a sudden—a lot of time. Previously, with work and everything and family, I just didn’t have time much to read or whatever, even though I did those morning devotions. But so now, I had a lot of time and God’s Word was my well.
So I really, for hours, sat there and just read and read and read, and it was feeding me. And then I came across Christian radio—Moody Radio—here in Illinois. And then my learning exploded. We worshipped with a Presbyterian church and then briefly with a Pentecostal church, and in that church, the pastor’s wife offered to pray with me. And so, I would say—her name is Julie—that she discipled me, although at that point I believe I had come to Christ already. So being home and drinking from the well of the Word.
And I read a book about overcoming toxic parenting, and so dealing with my past—that was the process. Reading some C.S. Lewis, actually, which I loved and had yearned to read for a long time, too. So that’s what God used to bring me to Christ. And so that was sometime in March of 2017. I don’t even know the date. I just noticed from March to April there was a change. Something had changed. I came to the point where I just desperately needed him. I begged him, because the burden of brokenness was literally crushing me. I did not know what else to do. He led me to the point where he was the only solution. Praise God! So I’m fifty years old at that point. So—unbelievable.
Eden: Wow. That’s so wonderful. And, you know, we hear a lot of stories of people that come to know Jesus because of their parents or people who come to know Jesus as teenagers. And, you know, he can grab ahold of our heart at any age, in any stage of life. And it’s wonderful to hear the way that he worked in your life and your home. And as you were talking about when you really started eating up God’s Word and just reading all the time: Do you remember any specific passages that really jumped out to you or really changed your thinking?
Iveta Berzinch: Well, I think that the Luke passage that I was talking about before, that was actually more around that time. Couldn’t tell you if I was saved yet or not. Like I say, it was a dark time—but around that time. I can’t even say what I was reading, but just reading and then hearing many sermons, literally almost each day on Moody Radio—people preaching and [me] discovering that there is this deep expositional preaching and how the whole Bible holds together, how it all points to Christ. That was also something I had never come across. In Latvia, I had never heard a sermon on [the] Old Testament. They just don’t. I mean, maybe, maybe on [the] Ten Commandments. [I] wasn’t that kind of listener at that point, I’m sure. But that was just surprising to me.
Eden: That’s wonderful. And you talked a little bit about how you were kind of in a midlife crisis, like identity crisis over, you know, “I’m not a doctor anymore. Like, what’s my purpose in life? What’s my vision?” When you gave your life to Christ, and when he saved you—when he did that change in your heart—how did that impact your view of your purpose and your identity? And how did God renew that place in your life?
Iveta Berzinch: Yeah, that’s a major thing when essentially, I think my feeling—if I may say—when I came to Christ was like, I belong, finally I belong. It’s like an orphan finding a home, like he is my home. I think that the greater grasp of the purpose has come more over time since then. But I immediately felt compelled to be more relational, like to engage, be intentional in developing relationships.
I realized my kids had essentially grown up without me, because I worked so much. And, you know, yes, we spent some time together, but day-to-day, on ordinary days, sometimes they saw me only for an hour, if that. So my first [stage] was, I think, realization. I need to get to know my kids. I need to build relationships. I need to spend time with them to find out what they like and [we need to] do things together. So, yeah, being more intentionally involved and building relationships was, I think, one of the biggest things that stands out.
And then, of course, finding such wonderful teaching at The Orchard and on Moody, [I began asking], “How can I get this to other people?” That was one of the other things [that shifted in my purpose]—the desire to tell other people. So, I’ve [also] done a little bit of translating and trying to send things to my folks back in Latvia [to] tell them.
Eden: Wonderful. Well, I love that. It sounds like the change that Jesus brought about in your life was love. Like, you went from thinking inwardly, “what’s the end of my life,” to suddenly turning outward to all of these other people and caring so much for their concerns. And I love that, you know, God transforms our heart, and he does that in so many ways. But the mark of his people is love and a loving spirit. And he put that in you, and he changed you that way. So what does your life and ministry look like now? Now that you’re following Jesus, what does he have you doing in the world day-to-day?
Iveta Berzinch: Well, I think my most consistent thing is serving in the church. I just did not have any desire to go back into [the] medical field, because also, that was one thing I realized that I don’t think was ever truly for me. It’s just something that I ended up going in because of how I grew up and all that. So, serving in church, serving as a deacon—I agreed and accepted to serve another term. And [I serve] with children at church, because I love children. And [I] got into a little bit of translating, just voluntarily [through] Open the Bible, the story. That’s being edited now.
Eden: I usually like to ask if there is a book or a resource outside of the Bible that’s also been instrumental in your walk with Jesus. So, do you have like one or two books that have really been helpful as you get to know the Lord?
Iveta Berzinch: Yeah, I mentioned C.S. Lewis. So I had his, I think it’s called Signature Collection, so it had Mere Christianity, The Problem of Pain, The Great Divorce, The Four Loves, and God in the Dock, I think in there. So all of those. As I had time to read, it was just amazing: I loved that. I guess it spoke more to my intellectual side and yet still to the heart as well. But I had come across it [the Signature Collection] way back in Georgia, and so I had put or God probably put the mark in my brain that you need to get back to reading that. So I was glad to do that.
And then, I’m not even sure how I came across [Charles] Spurgeon. Probably somebody mentioned him in some sermon or something, so some years ago I bought Morning and Evening devotional, and I just haven’t been able to part with it. That’s something I read in the evenings in my bed. Just how he exalts Christ and all that Christ has done for us is just so encouraging and uplifting and confirming in faith and spurring on into more faith and love.
Eden: Yeah, it’s so rich. And is there a way that you especially like to study the Bible, like on your own? Like as you spend time reading the Word, what does that look like for you?
Iveta Berzinch: Yeah. Well, obviously it’s changing over time to some degree, but I spend time in the morning with the Lord. The devotionals that I use change. Of course, I’ve used Open the Bible and then Today in the Word, then Moody and some others. Studying for our Bible for the life groups. Since I lead one, then I love to delve into more using either commentary or just referencing other Scriptures. And I just love how the Lord opens the Word and the fresh insights.
Eden: Wonderful. So it sounds like you like to often have something with your Bible, helping you through it, helping you understand it.
Iveta Berzinch: Yes. Yeah. Although I’ve also [heard]: Read the passage first yourself. So you’re not just feeding off of other people, but you’re letting the Holy Spirit speak directly to us. And I think that’s important.
Eden: Yeah, Totally. Wow. Well, thank you for sharing your story with us of how Jesus saved you. That’s so encouraging to my heart to hear, and I just love hearing how he pursued you over time, you know, way back, planting a pastor up above you and getting God’s Word into your hands and then continuing to pursue you in the states. It’s just so neat to hear of his work in your life. So thank you for sharing that with us.
Iveta Berzinch: He’s been very patient and persistent and faithful. When I look back, I mean [for] decades. And I had all the reasons to think, “Oh, you know, all that religion is just empty. People just think.” But he just—there was a thread that kept coming through that. No, there’s something more. And just, once I tasted that, I could not stop yearning for it.
Eden: Wow. Wow. That is so wonderful. That reminds me of C.S. Lewis when he says, “If I find in myself a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, it must mean that I made for another world.”
Iveta Berzinch: Yes.
Eden: Thank you so much for listening to our podcast today. If you enjoyed our conversation, I would encourage you to like or subscribe to our podcast so that you can hear the next conversation. And if something that you heard today spoke to your heart or got you thinking, I would encourage you to not let the day go by without talking to God about what’s on your mind. We believe that he loves you and that he’s pursuing you today out of that love.