Why, God?
To say that’s a question people ask when they’re in pain would be framing it too lightly. This is the scream of a broken heart; it’s the groan of a wounded soul. It may be the one question left echoing in the mind overcome by trauma.
Why, God? is either a whimper or a howl, and it always comes from a churning heart.
Why might this be the cry of our hearts when we are in pain? Are we allowed to ask such a question? And is this a question that God answers?
We Ask “Why?” Because of Something We Believe
Before we go any further, let’s drag into the light our full questions behind, “Why, God?”: Why did this happen? Why did this happen to me? If you are powerful and kind, why did you not stop this evil from happening? If you are really in charge of my life, why is this part of my story?
The question, Why, God? looks like an intellectual quandary, but it doesn’t stay in our heads—it disturbs us, steals our sleep, and locks us up emotionally.
This cry springs from a belief. If we ask God Why? in the throes of tragedy, it’s because we believe that God has authority over the circumstances of our suffering. We know—whether consciously or subconsciously—that he is in control. So why didn’t he stop this awful experience from coming upon us?
In short, we hold God responsible for our pain. Our hearts echo some of Jesus’s friends, who in the face of their brother’s death cried, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died” (John 11:21 NIV).
Why, God? comes from a heart that feels like, in the moment of suffering, God is gone. And if he was present when this awful thing happened, he was either unjust, indifferent, or downright cruel.
These questions can torment both those with genuine faith in Jesus, and those who want nothing to do with God.
To the one who hates God, this Why? question will have a bitter tone, and their perplexity will only deepen their hatred of him—thus Why? ceases to be a question begging for answer, and becomes an accusation.
But when a genuine believer asks God Why?, while perhaps riddled with attitudes that may be later repented of, it is an expression of faith in God. Even if laced with anger or despair, the genuine believer’s Why, God? is still a question put to the God they have entered into covenant with, through Jesus Christ, and in whom they have put their trust.
Yes, It Is Good to Ask God “Why?”
It is audacious to ask God why he has ordained for some pain to permeate your life, and perhaps blame him for it. Yet, God welcomes us to pray boldly to him, even impudently (Luke 11:8)!
Although our cry of Why? may be poisoned by bitterness, misplaced anger, faulty understanding, and even unjust accusations, God’s mercy beckons us to always bring our entire selves to him in earnest prayer (Psalm 62:8; Psalm 25:1).
Although we may feel appropriately self-conscious about questioning God, God has provided many examples in Scripture of his faithful children doing just that—Abraham, Job, David, and Habakkuk are some, to name a few. Even Jesus, from a sinless heart, in his human weakness, asked God Why? (Matthew 27:46).
If you open the book of Psalms alone, you will find cries of Why, God? echoing among the diverse pain-filled cries of people who have sought refuge in God.
If Why, God? is our reigning thought and is holding us hostage, we can invite God into that echo chamber through prayer. He is not averse to the place where perplexed cries fill the air (Psalm 22:24). His mercy will willingly invade the dark atmospheres of our disoriented hearts ready to reveal himself to those he loves, who belong to him by faith in Christ.
Because our question is with God himself, we must take it up with him directly. We must not subject ourselves to the danger of distancing ourselves from him.
Will God Answer When We Cry Out “Why?”?
Yes, he will. In light of the revelation of Scripture, we can say confidently that God will answer us when we cry out to him with the prayer, Why, God?
Notice, we said he will answer us. He will not necessarily answer our question. And, we do not know when he will answer—just that he will answer.
The Bible reverberates with the prayers of saints who are distressed by a sense of God’s silence. But another sound echoes out of the Scriptures: A thousand assurances that the Lord hears the cries of his children (Psalm 34:15–16). He does not turn a deaf ear to those he loves, though we may accuse him of doing so (Psalm 22:1). He whose heart is full of mercy, who calls himself a God of compassion, does not despise or ignore the affliction of those who belong to him (Exodus 34:6; Psalm 22:24).
If we are God’s children through faith in Jesus, then our cries will not hit the ceiling—they will rise to the ears of our loving Father. Deafening silence may mock our faith in the God who hears, after we have cried out Why?, but the objective testimony of Scripture is that our prayer has been heard.
God responds to his children’s cries; if you are his child, he will reply to you.
How Does God Reply When I Ask “Why?”?
But how? How does God reply to the desperate plea for reasons for our suffering?
In answer to this question, we can say two definitive things—first, how God will not respond to this plea.
How God Will Not Respond to Your Question
God does not usually give his children definite answers as to why our loved one died of cancer, why we lost a limb, why our family fell apart, why our community got hit with natural disaster, why our friend betrayed us, why our marriage ended in adultery, why he has not removed an oppressive person from our life. He doesn’t tell us why such pages are included in the epic of our existence, or why this particular colored thread is included in the tapestry of our lives.[1] He does not usually explain how our tragedy will turn out for our deliverance, or why he did not deploy his power to prevent a certain pain in our time.
He does tell us that he is working all things together for our good, and so in faith we may eventually be able to point to good things that came out of our suffering (Romans 8:28; Psalm 119:71), but we cannot rely on our understanding alone for why God would not stop the evils we experience. Such things are beyond our comprehension (Psalm 131).
How God Will Respond to Your Question
Here is the second definitive response we can give to the question of how God will reply to our Why?—you can expect him to reply according to all the promises he has made in Scripture.
Although those of us who have faith in Christ all relate to the same God, he, like a loving Father, knows each of his children and relates to us differently according to his wisdom (though always in a manner that is true to his character as revealed in Scripture).
God has made many promises to us in Christ that we can fully rely on him to fulfill. He promises to comfort his children in every affliction we suffer—including the one that motivates you to cry out, Why, God? (2 Corinthians 1:1-3). He promises to bring peace to the hearts of those who voice their concerns to him in prayer (Philippians 4:6–7). He promises to sustain those who cast their burdens upon him (1 Peter 5:7; Psalm 55:22). He promises to be present with his people always (Matthew 28:16–20). He promises that nothing, not even this question shaking us, can shake his love for us, much less separate us from it (Romans 8:38-39).
The Bible is a vast record of God’s responses to saints who cry out to him in pain. His answers to the cries of his children are both diverse and specific. Here is how he answered those who belonged to him by faith in their desperate questions: He fed Elijah, he revealed his glory to Job, he surrounded David with a band of loyal companions as comfort, he sent an angel to comfort Daniel, he provided a family for Naomi, he gave Hannah a son, he gave Jeremiah a stabilizing conviction in the certainty of his steadfast love, and he raised Jesus from the dead (1 Kings 19:6; Job 40-42; 1 Samuel 22:1-2; Daniel 9:21-22; Ruth 4:14-17;1 Samuel 1:16, 20; Lamentations 3:21-24; Acts 2:32) . All these people cried out to God in their distress and, in time, God responded to each one.
We cannot tell you how or when God will respond to your desperate cry of Why, God? but we do trust that in time God will answer you—even if that answer is the plain assurance in the quiet of your heart of his presence with you, and even if that answer feels like silence as he carries you in ways you cannot perceive until it’s time to show you his glory again. God will answer you. He always responds to the cries of his children—even the darkest cries.
Two Decisions You’ll Have to Make When You’re Asking, “Why, God?”
The state of the heart in which the Why, God? question reigns is a vulnerable and potentially dangerous one.
If we harbor the question in our heart without expressing it to him, we risk coming to wrong conclusions rather than receiving the Lord’s response. Hearts darkened by grief often come to miserable conclusions and clouds of despair can quickly overshadow the perplexed heart. If we don’t bring our Why, God? to God, we may not only grow distant from him but also embrace a darkened caricature of God which we come to despise.
We must bring him our heart’s implicit judgments—that he has not behaved as we thought he promised, not lived up to his character, or was not justified overlooking such an evil—that we might hear him reassure us of his own love, faithfulness, justice, wisdom, and mercy. Otherwise, we may come to inaccurate and terrible conclusions about him.
Our first choice when our hearts begin to shout Why? is whether we will take that question to God. Our second choice, if we choose to bring our question to God, is whether we will leave it there with him.
What We Learn from Jesus About Asking, “Why?”
Jesus left his Why, God? question at the feet of the Father when he took his final breaths on the cross (Matthew 27:46). God did not answer him at the moment. Jesus’ question seemed to go unheard.
Jesus died. Jesus was buried. Jesus lay in a tomb dead for three days.
And then God answered. God raised Jesus from the dead. God gave Jesus an answer better than the one he pleaded for—and it’s an answer that serves as a pattern for God’s answers to us in our own pain.
We often ask for deliverance from pain. We wonder, “Why am I having to endure this?” God often delivers us through pain, empowering us in the pain by his sustaining grace to come out on the other side.
The Father answered Jesus’ Why, God? not with reasons but with resurrection. God may answer your Why, God? not with reasons but with renewal, refreshment, and ultimately, reward.
What We Can Expect to Gain from Honestly Asking God, “Why?”
Listen to what Hebrews 11 tells us: “And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him” (Hebrews 11:6 ESV).
God’s Word tells us here that God rewards those who earnestly seek him. We do not know the shape of that reward, though we know that the ultimate reward he gives is deeper communion with himself (Philippians 3:8). You can be sure God will answer your Why? eventually, in his time, with the reward of deeper communion with him, because you have earnestly sought him.
How long until you get an answer after crying out Why? We don’t know how swiftly God will answer your cries. But we know he’s faithful, and you can rest knowing that you have left your questions and your perplexity where they belong—at the feet of a God who loves you.
We need not be ashamed of the reflex of our hearts to ask God why we are suffering. He welcomes our questions, and his presence is the only proper place for our souls to breathe. We can expect that he will listen to us, and respond, even if he never answers our question directly. We can choose to leave our Why? question with him and believe that though he does not give reasons, he will reward us for coming to him.
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Sources
1. This sentence was inspired by the song “Tapestry” by Brandon Engman and Miri Mesika in the David Movie, produced by Angel Studios, which you an hear here: https://youtu.be/bYaj9lArj6A?si=6-gYC7bwcKtP3bXO.